


liquor up, i'm far from tipsy

by CrazyLaughter



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: After November 2015, Canon, Dialogue, Implied fake Zerrie, JayStyle, M/M, No Romance, No insult to Rebecca Ferguson
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-13
Updated: 2015-10-13
Packaged: 2018-04-26 05:43:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,542
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4992529
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrazyLaughter/pseuds/CrazyLaughter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Where Niall decides to make (shapeless) cupcakes, Zayn is (not) gay, Perrie is with a companion of (steamy) cartoon pornography, Taylor and Liam are (trying) to be sane, Sophia is just (genuinely) flustered by everything and Larry are just being (silly) Larry. So, yeah, they're all very drunk.</p><p> </p><p>[or]<br/>A prompt given to me that got carried away immensely.<br/>"Write about your OTP and their friend circle drunk, and write about your OTP drunkenly telling the story of how they met."</p>
            </blockquote>





	liquor up, i'm far from tipsy

**Author's Note:**

  * For [compunctious](https://archiveofourown.org/users/compunctious/gifts).



> So, here's your prompt. I've tried, don't blame me.  
> Also, I mean no insult to any character here. It's all fiction that's crude.  
> This is written in Jaystyle (people on Wattpad will know), which emphasizes on dialogue.

**[Scene 1: Living Room, The Larry Apartment, 1:36 AM, Drunk in Love]**

**[LIAM is on the floor, limbs sprawled out with SOPHIA'S head on his stomach. NIALL is awake, lying shirtless with his legs lined against the wall. HARRY sitting curled up on of the couches. LOUIS is cuddled with him, face in neck. ZAYN is sitting sloppily on the recliner. PERRIE AND TAYLOR switching a bottle back and forth]**

**ZAYN:** _(hiccups)_ "We had a good time, lads. Best in...in. The forever of 2015."

 **NIALL:** _(murmurs)_ "The forever of 2015."

 **ZAYN:** "Yes, you see. Every conflict can be resolved with a little alcohol."

 **SOPHIA:** "Yes, little alcohol." _(looks at the many bottles spread out on the floor)_ "Little."

 **TAYLOR:** _(smiles dopey at Perrie)_ "It was resolved with fists. Does he have a memory problem?"

 **PERRIE:** _(giggling, whispers)_ "It's an ego problem, actually."

 **ZAYN:** "Shut up, ladies. As I was saying..."

 **LOUIS:** _(burps into Harry's neck)_ "Such eloquence."

 **HARRY:** _(squeals, pushes him off)_ "You're disgusting."

 **LOUIS:** _(nuzzles back)_ "Shut up, lady."

 **TAYLOR:** "E-low-quence, ha. Somebody swallowed a diction-ary. Addiction-arry. Oh wait. Louis. Louis has an Addiction-Harry. Get it? The Addiction of Harry." _(giggles)_ "I'm genius."

 **LIAM:** "Harry's sense of humour rubbed off on Tay-Tay." ( _dry)_ "Oh no."

 **HARRY:** "Hey!"

 **ZAYN:** _(screaming)_ "Stop interrupting my soliloquy, okay? Do you even have any idea how hard it is to speak when your drunk? Do you know how difficult it is to form a word? Do you, huh?" _(calming down)_ "Now, where were we?"

 **SOPHIA:** _(whispering to Liam)_ "Is he okay?"

 **LIAM:** _(snorts)_ "You think he is?"

 **PERRIE:** _(grinning)_ "It's an ego thing, Soph. He has so much of ego that it took over the cer-cerebrum of his brain. You know. Like, in that Spiderman movie? That black sticky stuff comes and sticks to Peter? It's like that."

 **SOPHIA** _: (eyes wide in realization)_ "Oh."

 **NIALL:** ( _shouting)_ "Perrie, you beautiful woman, you are nothing but a witch! Just because Zayn dumped you through text, you can't speak like that! That's wrong, cut him some slack."

 **TAYLOR:** "Repeat that to yourself and see if that sounds normal."

 **ZAYN:** ( _stops, looking at Perrie, smirks_ ) "I'm sorry for dumping you like that, love. But that's what you deserved."

 **PERRIE:** ( _smirking back_ ) "I know, sweets, I know. I hadn't seen that the fault was in me for so long. I thought I was being the perfect fiancée."

 **ZAYN:** ( _snorts)_ "You clearly weren't."

 **PERRIE:** ( _twists mouth_ ) "But we had chemistry like no other. My acting skills were pretty good, yours though...I doubt."

 **ZAYN:** "Oi! I made almost the whole world believe that I was madly in love with you!"

 **PERRIE:** "Excuse me! I'm the one that made it evident, but technically dedicating _Hair_ to you! I got paid for it too!" ( _singing pointedly)_ "Cause he was just a-" ( _clicks tongue)_ "and I knew it!"

 **LOUIS:** ( _snaps up_ ) "Wait, wait, hold up! You got paid for being his girlfriend!"

 **NIALL:** _(turning to glare at them)_ "As I was saying, before two hot blonde women and a human Adonis interrupted me-"

 **HARRY:** _(nodding_ ) "He does that when he's drunk. He compliments people."

 **NIALL:** "It isn't because of ego, Pezzies. It's his hair. You know why his hair was so big? Because it had his rationality in it. When he shaved it off. It went. Poof! Away with the wind. He keeps shaving it off. Which is why. He isn't sane anymore." _(grave)_ "And he never will be."

 **ZAYN:** "Niall, keep all the holes in your body shut. As I was saying-"

 **TAYLOR:** "And he remembers."

 **ZAYN:** "-that any problem can be resolved with a bit of alcohol. This year has been a r-roller coaster that's coming to the. End. The end. Oh my God, Lou. You're going to turn twenty four." _(giggling)_ "That's. That's old. Really old."

 **LIAM:** ( _looks at Louis_ ) "Alcohol, he says. Should we remind him with what we actually resolved it with?"

 **HARRY:** "Poor guy, leave him alone!"

 **LOUIS:** "If you remember correctly, Zayn. There are three identical bruises, one along your sternum, one above your hip and the one square in your eye. Large ones, mind you. I made the one on your eye. For all my anger. Taylor and Liam can claim what they want to."

 **LIAM:** "I made the one above your hip! Like, with my fist, not with my mouth. Not with my mouth. For...just because. I was...marking my territory. Because I...love you?"

 **SOPHIA:** _(whispering to herself)_ "Ooh, Ziam. This is my dream. It's come true."

 **NIALL:** "Sophia, I have never seen a wiser woman than you. Elope with me. Leave Liam. He's better with Mistress Malik. Plus, I'm clearly better in bed."

 **LIAM:** "I heard that."

 **SOPHIA:** "Seems like a good bargain. When you mention bed and tactics. You got me. There."

 **TAYLOR:** "Ooh! Ooh! I think. The sternum one, I made. For hurting my Calvin before."

 **LOUIS:** _(mocks)_ "Your Calvin. Ditched my Harry. For You're Calvin. Tasteless. Absolutely Tasteless."

 **HARRY:** _(fond chiding)_ "Be nice, Lou. She helped us out. Like..." _(Perrie gags)_ "Perrie don't make me come there. I'll pluck your intestines out and knit a sweater out of them for you."

 **LOUIS:** "There's my boy. He knows how to be mean by being nice."

 **ZAYN:** "I thought we were over this once you took your physical revenge. I thought I was forgiven. Louis. Forgiven?"

 **LOUIS:** "Maybe."

 **NIALL:** _(covering, to Liam, singing)_ "Do you wanna build a snowman?"

 **LIAM:** "Not this again...He's having his Frozen phase again, God help me."

 **NIALL:** "Let's try that again. Do you wanna make some cupcakes? It doesn't have to be cupcakes."

 **LIAM:** _(rolls eyes)_ "Go away, Niall."

 **NIALL:** _(struggles to stand up and balance himself)_ "Okay, bye."

 **HARRY:** _(watching Niall go away)_ "I just hope he doesn't blow up the kitchen. Oh actually. Wait. I hope he does. Louis doesn't have to be the only one put to shame for burning everything."

 **LOUIS:** _(pinches Harry's side, hiccupping)_ "I don't b-burn everything. That's a. Large. Ex-aggeration."

 **HARRY:** "Nope. Not exaggerating. The only time you didn't burn anything was when you made-"

 **EVERYBODY ELSE:** _(droning in unison)_ "Chicken wrapped in parma-ham with a side of homemade mash."

 **NIALL:** _(shouting from kitchen_ ) "We all know."

 **LOUIS:** ( _awkward_ ) "Um, yeah."

 **TAYLOR:** "I think I've been your beard, a very good one, if I add. I want to know. How you two met."

 **PERRIE** : "No, I do too. I did my share of proper bearding."

 **ZAYN** : _(incredulous_ ) "I'm not gay!"

 **SOPHIA:** "But there is something very gay about you, Zayn, I can't put my finger on it. Oh wait. I think it's because you eye my boyfriend in the most pl-platonic way. Possible. Like, so much of sexual tension."

 **HARRY:** ( _slow)_ "Point. I've seen it."

 **LIAM:** ( _looks at Zayn_ ) "You could have told me, Zayn. I know you've wanted this body for so long."

 **ZAYN:** ( _scowls_ ) "Shut up. I didn't. I wanted your body for ages."

 **NIALL:** _(clanging pots_ ) "Ooh!"

 **TAYLOR:** "Stop! Stop! We were talking about Larry! Let them talk! We're supposed to- Perrie-" ( _glances at Perrie engrossed with her phone_ ) "Perrie, what are you doing?"

 **PERRIE:** ( _nonchalant)_ "Watching porn. I'm rather interested in this. Than trying to convince you that my ex-fiancé is gay. I already knew that."

 **ZAYN:** "Hey!"

 **LOUIS:** _(coughs_ ) "What?"

 **LIAM:** ( _goes to sit next to her_ ) "Ooh, ooh, show me!" _(backs away, horrified)_ "She's watching gay porn. Um."

 **TAYLOR:** ( _watches phone, realizing_ ) "So, this is how you actually do it!"

 **SOPHIA:** ( _dry)_ "That's cartoon, Taylor. Why is that not scarring you? That's freaking Freddy and Shaggy shagging each other."

 **HARRY:** "Hmm. Alliteration."

 **ZAYN:** "I know way too much about gay sex already, please no more."

 **SOPHIA:** "Aha! There's a sign. He's gay. If he knows a lot. He knows a lot. He's. He's gay."

 **ZAYN** : "Stop."

 **LIAM:** "That explains why he uses so much of hair spray. Gaaaaaaaaaaay."

 **LOUIS:** "He doesn't have hair anymore, you dolt. He's as bald as an egg."

 **ZAYN:** "You did _not_ compare my head to a egg."

 **HARRY:** _(spaced)_ "Ooh, that rhymed."

 **LOUIS:** _(challenging_ ) "I did, you skanky bint. Come at me."

 **PERRIE:** _(looks up, surprised_ ) "Zayn, as your fake ex-fiancée, I'm warning and I want the best for you. Do not. Mess with. Louis. You'll need plastic surgery after that."

 **HARRY:** _(nodding_ ) "Yes, because your face will melt with how hot he'll sound when he's cursing you out."

 **TAYLOR:** ( _still looks at video_ ) "Is this supposed to turn me on?"

 **ZAYN:** "You-"

 **PERRIE:** "Shut it!" ( _throws phone somewhere_ ) "Shut it all of you!"

 **TAYLOR:** "Hey, I was watching that!"

 **LIAM:** ( _trying American accent_ ) "I was watching that!"

 **SOPHIA:** "Forget it, Swift, that thing wasn't even interesting."

 **PERRIE:** ( _shouts_ ) "I need everyone's attention. Please. Okay. Let's go back to what we were ori-origi-" ( _huffs_ ) "This is so hard. Hard to speak when you're drunk. Okay, back to track. We were going on about how Louis and Harry met before you all started talking about how gay Zayn is."

 **ZAYN:** "Hey! You're the one who made it escalate by switching to cartoon porn!"

 **PERRIE:** "Don't bring my amazing collection of videos into this!"

 **ZAYN:** "Amazing! Pfft-"

 **TAYLOR:** "Cut it out!"

 **SOPHIA:** ( _knits eyebrows)_ "Cut what out?"

 **TAYLOR:** "Stop! We were talking. About Larry. How d'you meet?"

 **LIAM:** "Wait, Olaf is missing." ( _screaming_ ) "Niall, come here! Victoria Justice just called for you!"

 **NIALL:** ( _flushed, running up)_ "What? What? She, what?"

 **LIAM:** "I was kidding, come and sit down. Larry story."

 **NIALL:** (lights up) "Really?" ( _nestles next to Liam, sits against Sophia)_ "I don't have my blankie and teddy, but you can start."

 **LIAM:** "Look at him, a child on Christmas morning. He loves you too much, Me and Sophia aren't given that much importance!"

 **ZAYN:** "Sophia and I, Liam."

 **LIAM:** "Whatever, Grammar Nazi."

 **LOUIS:** "But cupcakes-"

 **NIALL:** "I've already set them in the oven."

 **HARRY:** "Already?"

 **SOPHIA:** "Shut up, they'll prob'ly taste like grasshopper excreta."

 **HARRY:** "So, you've tasted grasshopper excreta before?"

 **SOPHIA:** "Not the point."

 **TAYLOR** : _(hollers_ ) "Shut up! All of you!" ( _turns sweetly towards Larry_ ) "You can start."

 **LOUIS:** _(clears throat dramatically)_ "So, Once upon a time..."

 **HARRY** : ( _swatting him_ ) "Don't start it like that, you make it sound like a fairy-tale. It isn't."

 **LOUIS:** _(trying to roll eyes, but fall shut_ ) "Okay, not once upon a time, then. A few years ago."

 **ZAYN:** "Stop, that sounds too historical."

 **LOUIS:** "Fine. Back in 2009..."

 **LIAM:** "That sounds like you died or something."

 **LOUIS:** "Shut up, or I'll make it like you died in a few minutes, just wait."

 **HARRY:** ( _humming_ ) "I might help you, I still haven't sought revenge for kissing you in that concert. When was it? Two months ago? Yeah."

 **NIALL:** "I went and hid under my bed right after it, because. I knew things would blow up."

 **PERRIE:** "I actually thought Sophia and Harry would turn against both of them."

 **SOPHIA:** ( _giggling_ ) "I don't know about Harry, but I did. When we met up, I didn't let him touch me for two whole days." ( _giggles again_ ) "It was fun watching him trip again. And again."

 **LIAM:** _(groans, shaking head_ ) "Worst time ever. I was so sexually-frustrated and she wouldn't even let me touch her. So bad."

 **LOUIS:** "Ew. Straight stuff."

 **LIAM:** "You were straight once, as far as I remember. Before you met Harry."

 **LOUIS:** "You are born gay, Li. Harry just made me realize it. Anyone could waltz into your life and turn you gay, for all you know."

 **SOPHIA:** "Yeah, like, how with Zayn. Liam came into his life and turned him gay." (thinking) "I think gay stuff is less complicated and better though."

 **ZAYN:** "Shut up."

 **SOPHIA:** "That's hypocri-hypocritical of you, Zayn, you're gay anyway."

 **HARRY:** (looks at ceiling) "Why is everyone rhyming today?"

 **TAYLOR:** "Hey, back to the point now. Start your story."

 **LOUIS:** "Okay, we met in 2009. When-"

 **NIALL:** "Wait, I thought you met in 2010. You know, in the X Factor bathroom."

 **HARRY:** _(slightly cross_ ) "We did, but not for the first time."

 **LIAM:** "Why didn't you tell us?"

 **HARRY:** "Because it's our thing. We just don't go sharing it with people."

 **TAYLOR:** _(raises eyebrow)_ "Why are you telling us now, then?"

 **HARRY:** _(obvious tone)_ "Because you're not going to remember."

 **TAYLOR:** ( _gapes_ ) "Oh my God. Harry, you're genius. I mean, wow."

 **HARRY:** ( _pleased with himself_ ) "Thank you."

 **LOUIS:** "As I said before a string of people interrupted. We met in 2009. At the Battle of Bands in Donny."

 **HARRY:** ( _grinning)_ "I actually made my mum drive all the way to Doncaster, because I didn't want to miss it. I was an opportunity to sing. Like, in public. I had promise to wash the dishes for two weeks, if she left me go. I didn't win the competition. But I won. Something else."

 **NIALL:** ( _sniffles_ ) "Muh bae Ed's missing all this. Curse him."

 **LOUIS:** ( _soft_ ) "Babe."

 **PERRIE:** "Aww!"

 **SOPHIA:** "This is so cute already!"

 **TAYLOR:** "Continue! Continue!"

 **HARRY:** "Wait till both of us meet."

 **ZAYN:** (snickering) "Girls."

 **NIALL:** "Shut up, baldy. If you don't want to listen, get out."

 **PERRIE:** "Shut it. Lou, continue."

 **LOUIS:** "The competition was over and all. We didn't win, but we came third place. I remember seeing the White Eskimo and The Rogue posters next to each other and wondering. Why there was so much craze for this other band. I was upset. A little."

 **LIAM:** "Nobody here cares about your feelings here, Lou. Let Harry speak."

 **NIALL:** _(singing to himself)_ "Nobody, nobody."

 **HARRY:** ( _sitting up enthusiastically_ ) "Well, I was devastated but only for a minute. After the competition, there were compli. Complimentary refreshments. So, I went in there after my mum failed to pick me up. All my mates left, so I had nothing to do.

 **LOUIS:** "I went in there too. And when I went to get some water, I saw a boy."

 **TAYLOR:** "Let me guess, that was Harry!"

 **LOUIS:** "That was the cardboard cut-out of Justin Bieber."

 **ZAYN:** "What? That detail was unnecessary."

 **LOUIS:** "Don't interrupt the master." _(licks lips)_ "So, next to it was-"

 **PERRIE:** "Was Harry!"

 **LOUIS:** "No, it was the water filterer."

 **NIALL:** "Bloody hell, Lou. Where are you going with this?!"

 **LOUIS:** "So, I was going to drink some water, but I looked up and I saw-"

 **EVERYBODY ELSE:** "Harry!"

 **LOUIS:** "Wrong again, it was the floor custodian."

 **PERRIE:** _(furious)_ "I'm going to cut you into minute pieces and feed them to the crows, Louis!"

 **LIAM:** "We don't care, fast forward to Harry!"

 **LOUIS:** "Don't rush the story, there won't be any feel." _(sighs)_ "So, I asked him where the food was and he pointed it out, so I went over, got a plate and aimed over to the cupcakes."

 **SOPHIA:** "Ooh, cupcakes. I like where this is heading."

 **LOUIS:** "There was this really curly haired boy, watching the cupcakes with squinty eyes. So, I thought it would be fun to go over."

 **LIAM:** ( _in realization_ ) "That's Harry!"

 **NIALL:** "Yeah, Harry!"

 **ZAYN:** Hmph. Cupcakes and Harry."

 **TAYLOR** : "Shut up, you cynical piece of poop."

 **HARRY:** "I hear somebody say 'is your armpit hair as curly as it is on your head?' and I turn to see Louis."

 **PERRIE:** "What? That's not cute at all."

 **NIALL:** "This isn't the way its supposed to go!"

 **ZAYN:** _(roaring with laughter, patting Liam who's rolling with it)_ "Oh god, that's. ( _laughs again_ ) "That's brilliant."

 **LIAM:** "This is too good!"

 **PERRIE:** "No it isn't! Boys, I swear."

 **HARRY:** "I answer him 'I don't know, haven't sprouted any'." _(smiles when Zayn hiccups with laughter_ ) "And I ask him in return if he's actually blonde, or if it's the light."

 **LOUIS:** "And I say, I have brown hair, thank you very much. We talk for a while until Anne comes to pick him up, and I almost completely forget about him."

 **TAYLOR:** "No, no, no! That's not fair! For such a...star-crossed love, you should meet in a much more beautiful way!"

 **HARRY:**  "Expect the unexpected?"

 **SOPHIA:** "What about the Oops and Hi tattoos?"

 **LOUIS:** "What about them?"

 **SOPHIA:** "Aren't those your first words to each other?"

 **LOUIS:** "Technically, they are. But, just think about it. Just imagine 'is your armpit hair as curly as it is on your head' written across my arm or something? Embarrassment."

 **PERRIE:** "Then why did you get those?"

 **LOUIS:** "Because they're better."

 **PERRIE:** "So, Oops and Hi aren't your words?" ( _goggling, unable to digest_ ) "But...but. I thought. I thought you. You guys were my OTP!"

 **SOPHIA:** "Teepees! Yes."

 **NIALL** : _(getting up, head down)_ "I wish. Wish I never. Knew. Why? Why did I?"

 **LIAM:** _(watches Niall walk away into kitchen)_ "Either Niall is being dramatic or you guys. Are being unfair. Honestly. I didn't want it to start like that."

 **HARRY:** _(scoffing)_ "Too bad."

 **LOUIS:** "Hey, hey, hey! We'll still be your OTP by the end, hang on!"

 **TAYLOR:** "No. Nope. I don't want to know. My vibe. Lost. I shouldn't. Have asked."

 **LOUIS:** _(ignoring her_ ) "So, we forgot about each other even though we probably were a part of each other's subconscious. I mean, I almost forgot 'bout him. Until..."

 **ZAYN:** "Until?"

 **PERRIE:** "Until?"

 **LOUIS:** "I thought you didn't care anymore."

 **PERRIE:** "No matter what my OTP do, I always stick. By their side."

 **HARRY:** "Wow."

 **LOUIS:** "But, you-"

 **TAYLOR:** "Shut up and get on with it, shorty!"

 **HARRY:** "He's not short! I'm just too long!"

 **LIAM:** "Fight later, Louis, finish it."

 **LOUIS:** "I see I have captured the audience again." _(chuckles deeply)_ "So, I was auditioning for the X Factor as you all know. And. I decided to go to the bathroom."

 **ZAYN:** "Great choice."

 **LIAM:** "Shut up, Zayn."

 **SOPHIA:** "This is where you meet!" ( _squealing)_ "Yes, yes,  _yes_!"

 **LOUIS:** "No actually, I ended up meeting Rebecca Ferguson on the way." 

 **ZAYN:** "Oh. Oh. I get it. Now, I get it."

 **SOPHIA:** "Who the hell cares about Rebecca Ferguson, right now? It's Larry time!"

 **LOUIS:** "Zayn did. Once."

 **ZAYN:**  "Now I get it. You hooked me up with her because she was a total-"

 **LOUIS:** "Yup. I always wanted the worst for you, my dear Zayn."

 **SOPHIA:** "Oh, now I get it."

 **ZAYN:** _(awkwardly pats Sophia)_ "Yeah, so do I."

 **SOPHIA:** "That lady turned Zayn gay."

 **HARRY:** "Why are you still rhyming?!"

 **ZAYN:** "Oh no, not this again."

 **SOPHIA:** "Liam was probably the closest guy that could get to a girl. I get it."

 **LIAM:** "Excuse me?"

 **PERRIE:** "You actually did look kind of like a girl, Liam. When Jade intro-introduced you to me, I thought the same. Too." 

 **LIAM** : "But, you guys, that's-"

 **LOUIS:** _(screaming_ ) "Liam cannot take the spotlight when I'm speaking! Let me. Complete!"

 **TAYLOR:** "Whatever. Continue."

 **LOUIS:** "So, after bumping into Zayn's vicious ex, I went into the bathroom."

 **PERRIE** : "I will not take the risk of saying that's Harry. Because. It always. Always, Turns out to be someone. Else."

 **LOUIS:** "Actually, it was Harry."

 **ZAYN:** ( _watches Perrie slump down_ ) "Behold."

 **HARRY** : "Weird thing. He was in the. Urinal. Next to mine. And he was sliding his zip down. And."

 **SOPHIA:** "Stop. I don't want to. Know more. You're. Disgusting."

 **HARRY:** "He elbowed me in the stomach. That's the part where we say Oops and Hi."

 **LIAM:** "What the hell? Were you guys peeing in the same one or something?"

 **TAYLOR:** "I cannot believe an epic love-story started at a. Urinal. This is just. No."

 **LOUIS:** ( _snorts)_ "Well, thanks to the urinal. We came very far."

 **PERRIE:** "What happens after that?"

 **LOUIS:** "I give my audition and-"

 **NIALL:** ( _stumbles in, shouting)_ "Cupcakes!"

 **LOUIS:** "Yes. Movie intermission. We'll be back. After a. Short break."

 **NIALL:** ( _sets them in the middle_ ) "My first drunk cupcakes, tell me how they are."

 **TAYLOR:** "Are those cupcakes or amoebas?"

 **ZAYN:** "Keep some remedies for poison ready."

 

**[Scene 2: Living Room, The Larry Apartment, 10:43 AM, The Next Ineluctable Day]**

**[LOUIS wakes up, groaning, finds everyone in respective places dozing off, except Harry. Hears whistling from kitchen, goes there]**

**LOUIS:** _(upon seeing Harry with a kettle on stove_ )"Morning, love."

 **HARRY:** _(looks up, smiles)_ "Lou. Pills are in the pantry."

 **LOUIS:** "Thanks, babe." _(presses a sloppy kiss, and swallows two pills dry)_ "Can I have some tea too?"

 **HARRY:** _(wrinkles nose, wipes cheek_ ) "You shouldn't have them dry. That's not good for you."

 **LOUIS:** _(drinks water after a rolls of eye)_ "Happy, you worry wart?"

 **HARRY:** "Very." _(smiles to himself)_ "Do you remember yesterday, Louis?"

 **LOUIS:** "A little. Niall's cupcakes are still in my mouth."

 **HARRY:** "I know, even mine. The guy mistook sugar for salt. It's a wonder that I'm not having high blood pressure now."

 **LOUIS:** "Yeah." _(after a while)_ "We also talked about how we met. Right?"

 **HARRY:** _(bursts out laughing)_ "We did such a good job spontaneously! I mean, that was so in sync. Like we planned it out or something. Even after we were so drunk!"

 **LOUIS:** "I know, right? They didn't suspect anything!"

 **HARRY** : "Do you think we should tell them the real story? The real story of how we met?"

 **LOUIS:** _(chuckles_ ) "I don't think so, Haz. It's our story, not theirs. It's our story, so we'll keep it to ourselves. Nobody needs to know."  

 

 

 

 

 


End file.
